I should have been there
by HumanGuineapig
Summary: A little tragic story for Coricopat and Tantomile. When Cori is killed, when he is murdered, Tantomile thinks of that day, of the events that took place. She says how sorry she is, how she should have been there. Sorry for crap summary, story is good!
1. Sorry, Brother

Brother,

I should have been there with you,

I shouldn't have left to go see Exotica and Cassandra,

Even though it was girl talk

I should have brought you along,

But instead I told you

You wouldn't be interested

And left you in the den all alone.

I blocked my connection with you,

So I didn't have to listen to you complain,

Or to have you listen to my conversation.

I forgot about you as I talked to Cass and Exotica.

I came back that night,

But you weren't there,

I thought it was nothing,

I thought you had gotten bored

And walked off.

The next morning when you didn't show,

I should have been concerned,

But I thought you were just sulking and moping,

And that's why you blocked your connection with me,

How I wish I didn't think that now.

Munkustrap began to grow worried

When you didn't return that evening,

I told him you were probably moody,

Because no one wanted to talk to you,

Munkustrap wasn't convinced though,

But I got him to wait one more day before panicking.

I wish I had listened to him now,

I wish I had let him send out that search party for you.

The next day,

You still didn't show up.

We all began to grow worried,

Even me.

Munkustrap was pacing, he was scared.

He had no idea where you might have gone.

He brought together a search party,

But it was already too late.

Macavity appeared in the yard,

Sending everyone into a panic.

He just laughed and looked at us all,

His magma red eyes finally resting on me.

"You should have realised," He told us all, laughing cruelly,

Before dropping something on the ground.

He disappeared then.

And then I heard Demeter's scream.

I ran forward, falling to my knees beside you.

You were bloody, so bloody.

Your gentle emerald green eyes were closed,

And they would never open again.

I had never felt you so cold, never.

I hissed at any cat that tried to come near you,

But it was finally Munkustrap that talked to me,

I allowed him to lift you and carry you to Jenny's den.

He was crying silently as he carried you,

I don't think I had ever seen him cry before.

You were his friend,

He was in shock that you were dead,

That you had been murdered.

I watched as Jenny checked you over,

Sobbing softly,

She said your neck had been snapped,

But you had also been raped as well.

That made me lose it.

You had been a virgin when you left,

What those monsters did to you,

Maybe it was for the best that they killed you,

So you didn't have to deal with that horrible memory.

Munkustrap cleaned you,

You couldn't be buried covered in blood.

I offered to do it,

But Munkustrap shook his head,

Saying that it wasn't right for me to do it,

That it wasn't right for me to groom the blood

From your dead body.

Your funeral was the next day,

Everyone was still in shock,

Still in shock that you had been murdered,

A quiet, gentle Tom like you,

Had been murdered by Macavity.

I was crying as Munkustrap spoke about you,

Saying that you had been a good friend of his,

Saying that you didn't deserve this.

Afterwards, everyone came past me,

Giving me words of comfort,

Telling me that they were there,

If I needed them.

It was too late for that now,

They hadn't been there for you,

But I guess, neither had I.

I was the one, who left you alone,

I was the one that left you

Alone in our den.

I should have been there,

I should have been with you,

I should have stopped you leaving the yard,

I could have stopped Macavity taking you,

Stopped Macavity torturing you.

He had you from the moment you left the yard,

He had tortured you for two days,

And killed you before he brought you back home.

I should have let Munkustrap send that party looking for you,

But instead I told him you were just sulking,

It never occurred to me that you were being tortured.

I'm left alone now,

No longer connected with your mind,

I feel so empty,

I feel so alone.

I was so used to having you connected with me,

That when I lost you,

It hurt so bad.

You should still be my side,

Both moving in sync with one another,

But you're gone.

And it's my fault!

Brother,

I am so sorry!

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I have no idea where that came from…but it just appeared. If it made you sad…well, that was sort of my intention, but sorry :)

I might put Cori's view up, before he was murdered.

Please read and review,

Luv HGP!


	2. Sorry, Sister

Sister,

I wish I had stayed in the den,

I wish I had been able to just,

To just stay in our den.

But instead I left the den,

Going to find Munkus or Misto.

I found Munkustrap,

Sitting on the tyre,

His sharp eyes fixed firmly on the kittens.

We talked for a while,

Before a fight between the kittens caused him to run off,

He was the last Jellicle I spoke to,

My last friend,

I decided to walk the streets,

Just to clear my mind,

Since I had no connection to you,

I had been out of the yard

For five minutes when he grabbed me,

When Macavity and his hench-cats ambushed me

They dragged me back to Macavity's lair,

Where I was tossed in a room,

And chained for I couldn't move,

I screamed for you, Tantomile,

Pleading with you to help me,

But you never came,

Bast, you probably didn't even realise I was gone,

Macavity just leered down at me,

Bast, I had never been so terrified.

I missed you by my side, Tanto.

At least then,

I knew I was going to be okay.

Pain was the only thing I knew next,

Countless claws digging into me,

Into,

My arms,

My legs,

My chest,

My face,

So much pain,

So much blood.

Macavity just laughed the whole time,

Occasionally joining in,

Getting me to scream in pain.

The Hidden Paw,

The Napoleon of Crime,

There are so many names,

But they don't tell you how ruthless he really is,

I don't know why that went through my mind,

It just did.

Maybe it was the terror,

Maybe it was the fear,

Maybe it was the pain,

But that was went through my mind,

That,

And thoughts of you, Sister,

By nightfall,

When Macavity finally ordered them to stop,

I knew you'd be just about back to the den,

Ready to connect your mind to mine again,

I couldn't let you,

I couldn't let you see what I was going through,

I couldn't let him hurt the both of us,

I blocked my thoughts from you,

Hoping I could spare you the pain,

That I was currently suffering.

Macavity just stared at me,

A pair of magma red eyes,

In the darkness.

He was thinking of something,

He was thinking of something bad,

I couldn't sleep,

I was in so much pain,

I was so terrified.

Macavity's kneeling beside me now,

Bast, Tantomile,

I'm so scared.

I try not to show it,

I try not to tremble as he runs his paw

Down the side of my face.

He is saying something about my eyes,

But I've got my ears pressed flat,

Pressed flat against my skull,

Trying to block out the awful words.

He left me then,

He left me lying on the cold stone floor,

Lying in my own blood.

He came back the next morning,

Kicking my side roughly,

Waking me up from whatever sleep I had put myself in,

What happened next,

Was the worst moment of my life.

I was held down,

My arms and legs pinned,

To the cold stone floor.

Macavity laughed cruelly,

Moving in between my legs.

I couldn't stop the tears that came to my eyes,

I tried so hard to stop the tears, Tant,

I tried so hard, but they came anyway.

It hurt so much,

It hurt so bad,

What he was doing to me,

I wish I had lost my virginity before that day,

But instead it was cruelly,

And painfully,

Taken from me.

Macavity ran his paw down my stomach

As he moved away from me,

I was crying, Sister,

I tried so hard to stop,

But I couldn't,

I couldn't stop it,

The hench-cats left me go,

But I couldn't move,

I was in so much pain,

I was so broken,

Macavity sat and watched me,

As I struggled uselessly,

As I struggled weakly,

On the floor.

I was so scared,

I was so hurt,

I was scarred from what he did to me,

I wanted to get free,

I wanted to get back to you, Sister,

To get back to someone

I knew cared for me.

But you didn't care,

Did you?

If you did,

I wouldn't be here right now,

Macavity's watching me as I cry once more,

But this time,

It's not from the pain,

It's not from innocence just stolen from me,

It's the fact that you're not here,

The fact that you're not helping me!

Macavity's by my side once more,

Laughing softly,

Laughing cruelly,

In my ear,

As he ran his claw across the side of my face,

Opening more wounds.

"One more day," He breathed in my ear.

I shivered,

"But you're not going back…alive,"

I couldn't help the shakes,

I couldn't help the trembles,

I know you'd hate me, Tantomile,

That I'm being so weak,

But I'm so terrified.

The night falls quickly,

And I remain terrified,

Terrified, but hoping,

That when tomorrow comes

You'll be there to save me,

To help me escape this.

When the sun rises,

I'm terrified,

Macavity walks over to me slowly,

Sister, I have never been more scared.

He crouches down beside me,

Being careful not to stand in my blood,

Which in now drying on the floor.

He rakes his claws across my chest once more,

Making me yowl in pain.

He stands up, taking a few steps back,

Before calling his hench-cats.

They attack me,

Leaving me more bloodied than before.

I'm hurting so much, Tantomile,

Where are you?

Surely you must have realised by now,

That I'm not just moping,

That I'm not just sulking,

I hope you realise,

That I need your help.

Macavity calls his hench-cats off me,

When I start screaming in pain,

My abused,

My broken body,

Unable to take anymore.

As I lie sobbing on the ground

He walks over to me,

Kneeling beside my head.

He places his claws on either side of my head,

All I can do is stare at him in terror.

"Plead for your life, Coricopat,"

His haunting words,

His terrifying words.

I shake my head.

I can't disappoint you, Tantomile.

I don't want to be weak anymore.

Macavity just sighed,

Shaking his head.

He snaps my neck and stands up.

He didn't kill me straight up,

It wasn't a clean snap,

It'll take a little while longer for me to die.

As my world begins to fade to black,

I think of you, Tantomile.

I know Macavity is going to take my body back,

To prove just how ruthless he is,

Murdering a quiet Tom like me,

And I know how this is going to torture you,

But I want you to know, Sister,

Though I may have thought bad of you,

Though I may have been bitter

About you not caring about me,

I know you do care,

You are my sister after all,

My caring Twin,

I know how my death,

How my murder,

Will hurt you.

But I want you to know, Sister,

That I do not blame you,

That I love you,

And I don't want you to torture yourself

Over my death.

My vision is blacking now,

I know my time is coming to an end,

The Everlasting Cat is waiting for me

And I can't keep her waiting.

I'll stay a moment longer,

Just to tell you, Tantomile,

That I care for you,

That you are the best sister I could ever have,

Tell Munkustrap to not be upset,

To not be angry,

I know he will be,

That he'll blame himself as well,

But I know you won't get this message,

But it's doing me good just to think this,

Do not blame yourself, Sister,

It is not your fault that Macavity took me,

It is not your fault he raped and tortured me,

I know you love me, Sister,

But siblings do argue, they do fight with one another.

But don't blame yourself for my death, Tantomile.

It wasn't your fault,

It was mine.

I love you, Sister…

Do not ruin your life,

By blaming yourself,

For torturing yourself,

Over my murder.

I love you, Tantomile…

My last thoughts are of you,

I love you, Sister,

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Nawww, that made me sad…it was pretty damn long as well,

I wrote this after I got back from the movies, after writing the first chapter…weird.

I'm probably writing as much as I can now, before I have to do exams, before I have to seriously do a lot of work next year for VCE…ah, almost done high-school :)

I don't know whether to leave this story as just Cori and Tants, or if I should put a chapter up for Munkustrap, going through what he went through that day, and what happened after Cori's murder…give me your opinion, please :)

Thanks to those who reviewed the first chapter!

Please read and review.

Luv HGP!


	3. Sorry, Twins

Twins,

I should have been there,

I should have done my job,

I should have been able

To save Coricopat

From my twisted brother.

I'm so sorry.

When you talked to me

Earlier that day,

I was watching the kittens,

Barely hearing what you were saying.

We talked for a while,

Until the kittens sent me running,

When I came back,

You were gone.

I wish I had told you to hang on,

To wait for me to come back.

You were my friend, Cori,

But I let you leave,

I let you slip from my mind.

The others thought me weird,

For being your friend.

How I wish now,

That I had tried harder to get them

To like you,

Maybe then,

Instead of leaving the yard,

You would have gone to one of them.

I watched as Tantomile went back

To your den that night,

I thought you were in there with her,

But the next morning,

Tantomile had come to me,

Asking if I had seen you.

I grew worried,

And tried to send out a search party for you,

Tantomile convinced me not to,

How I wish I hadn't listened to her now,

That I had followed my heart instead,

But I listened to your sister

Because I thought she knew you best.

As the next day came,

We all began to grow worried,

Even Tantomile,

Though she tried not to show it.

I had gathered those

Who would look for you.

But it was too late,

It was too late for you, Cori.

Macavity appeared in the yard,

In a flash of blue light.

I saw he was carrying something

Over his shoulder.

He looked around,

His eyes coming to rest on Tantomile.

"You should have realised," He laughed cruelly,

Before dropping whatever was on his shoulder,

Harshly onto the ground,

Before he disappeared.

I considered going after him,

Until I heard Demeter scream,

I watched as Tantomile collapsed to her knees,

Beside what Macavity had dropped.

I didn't even realise it was you, Cori.

Your fur was bloodied,

Your body broken,

Your emerald green eyes closed.

Tantomile,

She was so hurt,

She wouldn't let anyone near you,

Until I spoke to her.

She let me take you,

To lift you into my arms.

I started crying then.

You were my friend, Cori,

And I let you get murdered.

I felt so angry,

When Jenny said you had been raped.

I knew it was Macavity,

I knew it was my twisted older brother.

I felt terrible, Cori, I should have saved you,

Saved you from that terrible,

Horrifying,

Experience that he put you through.

I cleaned your blood off your fur,

I wouldn't let Tantomile do it,

It was better for her

For the last memory of you to be,

Not of her cleaning the blood from

Your broken body.

You were so cold, Cori,

I knew that Tantomile felt that too,

But you were too cold,

You should never have been that cold.

The next day,

At your funeral,

I spoke about you,

I told them how you were my friend,

I told them what a great Tom you were,

But it would never make a difference,

None of them made the effort to know you,

I wish I had pushed them harder,

Pushed them to make an effort.

Now they'd never know,

They'd never know what a great Tom you were.

I watched as they spoke to Tantomile,

Offering her words of comfort,

And words of condolences.

Her face remained blank,

I knew she was hurt without you,

I knew she felt empty.

A few days after your funeral,

I went to see Tantomile.

She was in your den,

Sitting on your nest,

Holding a small stuffed bear.

Jenny had given it to you,

When you were a kitten

And she was in charge of you,

Tantomile told me.

You never let it go,

Saying that it was the only thing,

Anyone had ever given you.

And Jenny had given it to you,

Because you were like her son.

I sat with Tantomile for a while.

I felt so bad,

Tantomile, I can you see struggling,

Struggling to get over the death of Cori,

Struggling to get used to being alone.

I am truly sorry, Tantomile.

I should have been there to save him,

I should have trusted my instinct,

To be a true leader,

And trust my feelings,

And gone to look for him.

I never thought that Macavity would be waiting,

Waiting for Cori to leave the yard.

I feel so bad,

I've lost a good friend,

I've lost one of my closest friends.

I have regrets in my life,

This being one of the biggest.

I let my one of my friends,

Be tortured, raped and murdered,

While I sat at the yard,

Waiting for him to come through the gates,

Looking sheepish for making us worry.

But he would never come through the gates again,

He would never lay eyes on his sister,

On his home.

I'm so sorry, Twins,

That I didn't try harder

To get everyone else to like you both,

To get everyone to look after you,

Maybe then Cori might not have died.

Though my brother may have killed him,

It was my fault,

I let Cori go without friends,

I let him leave the yard,

I didn't trust my instincts,

I didn't go look for him.

I didn't save him from Macavity,

From the pain he surely must have suffered.

I have failed you both,

As Protector.

I can't go on,

Being Protector,

Knowing that I let Cori be murdered,

And that because of that,

Tantomile will be forced to suffer,

Because I didn't help you, Cori,

Because I let you suffer and be murdered.

It's all my fault,

It truly is,

I'll never forgive myself,

Because I didn't save you,

Because now,

Both of you are now gone.

Though Tantomile may still be alive,

Her life has changed,

She refuses to talk to anyone,

Refuses to leave the den,

She holds the bear you once owned, Cori,

And she won't let it go.

I've let both of you be hurt,

One of you murdered,

The other left alone.

Twins,

I am truly sorry.

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Munkustrap's POV, because ObsessiveJemima asked. I don't know whether to leave it here, or go dark with Macavity's POV…you decide and I'll write, or not write it…yeah,

Thanks to those who reviewed,

Please read and review

Luv HGP!


	4. Jellicles, you should have listened

Jellicles,

You should have foreseen this,

You should have realised

That I wasn't done with you all yet.

Coricopat,

The lean,

Tall,

Quiet,

Calico Tom,

With emerald green eyes,

Well,

He caught my eye.

He and his twin,

But Tantomile,

She didn't interest me.

She was cold to him,

Leaving him alone

On so many occasions,

Just so she could talk to the girls.

I watched him,

I watched for days,

For weeks,

Even for a few months,

Just getting to know him,

To know his movements.

No one even noticed.

He might have realised a few times

That I was watching him,

Those nervous glances around the yard,

As he walked alone.

The slight panicked calls,

Trying to find out if someone was hiding

In the shadows,

Playing a joke.

Yes, Munkustrap,

I saw how you two talked,

How you seemed to be the only one,

The only one who cared about him,

The only friend he had.

But that wasn't going to deter me

From my plan.

The day I took him,

That life changing afternoon,

That would change the way the Jellicles thought,

The way they acted,

The way they treated each other.

I had watched as Tantomile left the den,

Leaving him all alone,

I watched as he finally emerged from the den,

Walking around the yard,

Looking quite lonely.

He walked to the tyre,

Talking to Munkustrap,

My pathetic younger brother.

Munkustrap's sharp eyes were fixed

Firmly on those annoying kittens.

Munkustrap ran off as a fight broke out

Between those squabbling brats,

Leaving Coricopat all alone.

He walked off then,

Heading towards the yard gates.

This was the chance,

The chance I had been waiting for.

As soon as he was a few streets

Away from the yard,

I ordered my hench-cats to pounce,

To capture the unaware

Calico,

Mystic.

To capture Coricopat.

He fought,

He fought quite bravely,

Though his emerald green eyes

Were wide with fear.

In the end,

He was overpowered,

And dragged back

To my lair.

He was chained,

The metal chains

Hanging from his thin wrists,

Those ankles,

The chains wrapped around

His long,

Lean legs.

He screamed for Tantomile to help him

When my hench-cats were torturing him

He just screamed her name

Over and over.

I sent my hench-cats to hurt him,

Their claws digging into

His thighs,

His chest

His arms

His face.

I laughed, watching Coricopat cry in pain,

I joined in the torture,

Enjoying the screams that broke free

From his control

I called them off.

His emerald green eyes,

Staring at me,

With so much fear.

His body was scratched,

His fur bloodied.

So many possibilities,

Choices of torture,

Different methods,

I wanted to see him break,

I wanted to take him back

To the yard,

Proving how ruthless I really was.

I found myself kneeling beside him,

Running my claw down the side of his frightened face,

Making him shudder

In his fear.

His eyes caught my attention,

They were so large,

So green,

So…innocent,

Yes, I could see how innocent he was,

Just by looking into those pools of green.

His ears are pressed flat against his skull,

Trying to block out my words.

I left him then,

Leaving him on the cold stone floor,

In the drying pool of his own blood.

I walked back in

The next morning,

Finding him asleep on the floor,

Probably from exhaustion.

He looked so innocent,

But he wouldn't for long.

I kicked his side,

Waking him up,

I called for my hench-cats,

They unwrapped some of the chains,

Pinning his arms and legs

To the cold stone floor.

I slowly pulled his legs apart,

Giving me the space I needed

To move in between them.

He was sobbing,

The sobs getting louder

With each thrust of mine.

He cried out for Tantomile to help him,

I don't even think he knew

That he yelled for her.

He was so terrified.

It was delicious.

I ran my paw

Down his soft stomach,

As I moved away from him.

It was surprising,

How soft the fur on his stomach was,

If I wasn't planning on killing him,

I would have kept him for my own amusement.

I sat watched him

As he cried,

As he struggled weakly,

As he struggled uselessly

On the cold stone floor.

His cries quieten down

After a while,

I know he is thinking,

He's hurt,

He's terrified,

And I just stole his virginity,

Cruelly and painfully,

But he was thinking,

Probably about that sister of his.

The one who wasn't even looking for him.

His cries start up again,

But this time

It's not from the pain,

It's not from the fear,

It's because he's left alone,

Because Tantomile isn't looking for him.

I walk over to him,

He doesn't even notice me approach,

I kneel beside his head again,

Laughing softly,

Laughing cruelly,

I run my paw down the side of his face again,

Opening up some more wounds

On his already bloodied cheek.

"One more day," I breathed in his ear,

His large emerald green eyes

Turned to look at me,

"But you're not going back…alive,"

I stood up,

Watching as he shook,

As he trembled.

He was so scared,

I loved it.

What intrigued me the most,

Was when he looked so terrified,

He looked…disgusted with himself,

I left the room, thinking of that.

When the sun rises,

I go back to Coricopat.

I crouch beside his head once more,

Being careful not to stand

In the pool of drying blood,

Surrounding his broken body.

His emerald green eyes

Meet mine once more.

I rake my claw across his chest once more,

Loving the pained yowl he made.

I call for my hench-cats,

Watching as they beat him up

For the last time.

I call them off

When he starts screaming in pure pain.

As he lies sobbing on the ground,

I walk over to him,

Kneeling beside him once more.

I place my claws

On either side of his head.

His emerald green eyes

Fearful

But

Resigned

"Plead for your life, Coricopat,"

He shakes his head,

That surprises me,

Oh well,

I would have kept him alive,

Kept him for myself,

If he had pleaded for his life.

I sighed,

Snapping his neck,

Though making sure

It wasn't a clean snap.

He would die slowly.

I watch as the tears spring to his eyes,

He's thinking,

I can see it in his eyes.

Probably thinking of his sister,

Of Munkustrap,

Of his home.

One last shuddering breath

And he went still,

Those emerald green eyes staring blankly ahead.

I walked over to him,

Picking him up,

Slinging the amazing light body over my shoulder,

I teleported myself to the yard.

They all stood in shock,

Staring at me.

I looked around,

My eyes coming to rest

On the one I was looking for.

Tantomile.

"You should have realised," I laughed cruelly.

I let Coricopat's cold body drop onto the ground,

Before I left the clearing.

I heard Demeter's scream,

I could distantly hear Tantomile's sobs.

I lingered for a moment longer,

Watching as my pathetic Protector brother

Took Coricopat's body into his arms,

Tears falling down his own cheeks.

Funny,

I had never seen him cry before.

I came back

A few days later,

Just to see what damage I had caused.

Tantomile was in their old den,

Holding a stuffed bear

Close to her chest,

As she sat on Cori's nest.

Munkustrap was talking to Old Deuteronomy,

Our father,

Saying that it was his fault Cori was dead,

That he shouldn't be Protector anymore,

That he wasn't worthy of the role.

I left the yard then,

A smile on my face.

I warned you, Jellicles,

But you didn't pay attention.

Murdering Coricopat wasn't necessary,

But you pushed me towards it.

I needed to show you how ruthless I was,

By murdering the tall,

The lean,

The quiet,

Mystic

Called Coricopat.

I warned you, Jellicles,

This time you better take heed of it.

CCCCCCCCCC CCCCCCCCCCCCC CCCCCCCCCCC CCCCCCCCCCCCC CCC

How was that for Macavity's POV?…and this is now done :)

Well, I'm back at school, *growl* so my updating of other stories might be a little slower, but I'll still update!

Thanks to everyone who reviewed!

Please read and review the last chapter!

Luv HGP!


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